so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Randomize
