I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
