He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
They are going to name an STD after you.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
