so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
