Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
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