Quick, to the slutcave!
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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