I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
