I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Randomize
