8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
