i don't like sucking hair
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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