Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
