If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
