i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
