I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
