I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
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