My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
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