and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Randomize
