Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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