weddingsv make me drug and hornr
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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