So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
