Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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