I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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