So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Randomize
