Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
