Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
