She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
