Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
