I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
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