Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Randomize
