My hand turned me down
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
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