I got chris browned last night
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
