Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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