turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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