wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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