i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
