How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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