Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize