How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Randomize
