Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
