But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
