I'm really into asian looking animals
You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Randomize
