Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Randomize
