For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Randomize
