oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
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