big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
