I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Randomize
