I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Randomize
