The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
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