Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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