He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
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